Category Archives: propaganda

b u

I am not happy with my post from yesterday so I am up early and re posting. I did not make the point I wanted to make; I was not successful in telling you what I wanted to tell you. Shit. I think, in simple, early morning raw words, I just wanted to say, let it be, be patient and let yourself evolve and be who you were born to be (and extend that offer to your children). I am so worn down from watching society tell us what we should be, laying out the blueprint for our cookie cutter lives. I am just offering a few words of support to firm up your feelings about who you REALLY are.
 I don’t watch much TV (I wish TV did not even exist) but sometimes in the late afternoon I need to do something mindless and I will sit in my chair with coffee and watch something – usually the Food Channel or the weather. Anyway, I cannot last very long because within 15 minutes I have been bombarded with so many “suggestions” on how to live my life all the while looking at these overly stylized fake people. Honestly, I feel like the most uncreative impotent person by the time I have absorbed 15 minutes of that noise. My husband watches a lot of the Discovery channel and History channel – I can support that – it’s the commercials and primetime that squash the life out of me.

 Anyway, back to the point – I don’t want some exaggerated stranger telling me where I should be in my life and what I should be doing and then continue on to “suggest” what is “normal” and try to make me feel bad if I am not “there” .That’s what I felt when I saw the daylily – it was there doing the thing it was supposed to do – blooming in the midst of neglect and not paying any mind to its surroundings – it just did its thing; it offered its natural beauty amongst and in spite of the adversity of its environment.

 It is difficult to not be negatively affected by the propaganda that surrounds us and even bombards us – especially now with technology literally plugged into our souls. This is the exact reason I started this blog, I had to rebel against the trash that was being pitched at me every day – I had to find a place where I could force myself to think of the simple things in life – the things that really mattered. It became a diving force to notice the dragonflies on the clothesline and the beauty of the midsummer sky, so that, in the evening, at the end of my day, I could document it and share it with you – simple, real words to read without propaganda and distortion. A soft place to land. Other than being an observer of life for nearly 58 years and an artist, I have no qualifications to say the things I say – I do not have a certificate hanging on my wall telling me I know everything, I am just writing what I see and, as I said, you can read it or not…I have to write.

Ultimately, this is where I go to be me and if there is something I write that inspires you to be you, I have reached another level of achievement and I feel especially happy. I tried once to not blog, but I was not able to …I have to write things down just as I have to paint. That is who I am and the whole purpose of this entry is to reinforce the importance of being who you are, not what someone tells you you are supposed to be. Anyway, to conclude, I hope you can battle and win against the propaganda that our world is laced with and, like the daylily from yesterday, b u.

if you have a few minutes, this video is wonderful … william emailed it to me a while back and i just watched it this morning; it seemed like serendipity that i watched it right after this post!

Get Real

I am writing this in stillness, complete quietness – not a machine running, not water dripping, not a voice. I type (peck) softly and I hear almost nothing. These moments rarely happen for me – aloneness, quietness. It’s funny but we mostly know ourselves through the people we are around mostly. It’s hard to find a spot where you can know you for real – not some reflection of whomever you are with.

It’s good to be able to “find yourself”. I suppose I was able to do that when I took the proverbial trip to Europe in my youth. I was in a place where no one even knew my name. I was able to discover many things about myself that I needed to know, things I still draw from today. But now, with all of these layers of life draped over me it is surely more difficult to get in touch with “ME”. I don’t say this as a narcissistic kind of thing; I say this because we need to know who we are so that we can be who we were born to be.

 It is so difficult today because of the distractions, propaganda and lies that bombard each minute of our days. I don’t really watch TV but when I am in “there” after about 10 minutes I feel, as they say, dumber and so violated with the fabrication that the media wants us to believe is life. If there were one single modern invention that has done more for the demoralization and dumbing of society, my vote would be, hands down, the TV. Even in my day, the fresh scrubbed late 50s, it began its handy work – telling mother’s how inept they were at their jobs and their marriages. The lies were not quite as big then, they were only selling Tide and Tang; today they are selling plastic surgery and overpriced luxury cars. The jury is still out for me on FB and the ramifications it is having. Like most things, it can be a useful tool – I have found a few old friends on it and I can learn about community events and I can post this blog entry on it but I suspect, as all things human, there will be negative issues attached to this means of communication. I am treading softly – trying to “keep it real”.

  Any way I am having a few moments to ask myself a few questions and get some honest answers and this entry is the manifestation of one of my questions – I absolutely hate the propaganda we are being fed intravenously every single day of our lives – that’s who I am, that’s the thorn.  I remember what my dad stubbornly proclaimed and infused us with – “Don’t believe anything you hear and only half of what you see.” I thought that was so harsh and bitter when I heard that in my adolescence but, Dad, like so many other things you said, I so get it now.

b u

p s

Thoughts on Thoreau

Like the moon, come out from behind the clouds! Shine… Meditate. Live purely. Be quiet. Do your work with mastery.
On the road again today – down to Geismar for a voice lesson (for Elizabeth). It seems Geismar was a small community between Baton Rouge and New Orleans that burgeoned because of the Crescent City exodus caused from Hurricane Katrina in 2005.I have driven nearly two hours and Elizabeth will have a 2 hour lesson from someone worth the time of this trip. Anyway, here I am sitting at an unfamiliar dining room table for the duration of the lesson – an opportunity to write. This entry will be directed towards me (if you choose to read it, I hope something is there for you). I am away from my house so all I can do is write and think – I can’t jump up at the sound of a buzzer to fold clothes or run to the kitchen because the pasta is boiling over, or say “I’m not interested” to the telemarketer on the landline or the Mormon at the door; I can’t pick figs ahead of the crows or pull weeds from my unkempt garden; all I can do is write.
I want to build on a thought I had early this morning – I was thinking of all of those years of abruptly springing from bed – snatching myself out of the elusive alpha state – and beginning my day without that creative connection. I am understanding why I chose to put my art in a dormant state for those years of intense, hands on, 24/7 parenting. My creative efforts were all channeled into my children then and I am very happy about that. Now, now that I can, I am enjoying immeasurably the time I have in the morning to explore my alpha state – I can see my life so clearly here. I understand, I recognize the right paths and the “big picture” here in the very early morning when there is no alarm or disturbance from the awaiting world. The more I know , the more I understand how we are hard wired to solve our own problems , it’s all there, we just don’t sit still enough to hear ourselves, we look everywhere for answers, every ” wrong where”, – the TV, magazines, society, everywhere but inside ourselves. Listen, listen. We can’t all physically go to Walden Pond, but, still, it can be a place we can “go”. I see my life better there in the early morning place, I see the beauty and I lessen the “issues”; I understand that my life is wonderful simply because it is “my” life – this is where I belong, right here in the smack middle of it – up to my elbows in the good stuff, the muck, the grime, the stuff that makes it mine. It is so important to reconnect with it to look at it from a distance, a spiritual look, a look at the bigger scheme of things. And in looking this way, all the little things go away, sort of like looking at the planet earth from space. The little annoyances that society says are important – ha – that’s so wrong, so wrong to be filled with propaganda and falsehoods, and illusions, this stuff that we get bombarded with daily is not true – don’t believe it, don’t let it into your life – it’ll mess you up, it’ll make you feel less than you are and that is not what the universe intended – we need to feel good about who we are so we can do good for the world. There, I’ve said it, I expressed how I feel.  I suppose this entry is more of a rant than anything else, but it annoys me so much the way outside forces motivated by money are constantly trying to tell me what is right for me and emphasis what is “wrong” about me and how “they” can fix it. At 57, I don’t fall prey to this gobbledygook (love this word – had to use it!) but I think of how many, mostly young, do. It’s all an illusion – smoke and mirrors – someone trying to sell you something, consumer driven society. Ok, got to go – I have an hour left and I want to put down some thoughts on something else I’m working on. I am where I need to be. We are the authors of our lives.
“I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did I wish to practise resignation, unless it was quite necessary. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan-like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner, and reduce it to its lowest terms, and, if it proved to be mean, why then to get the whole and genuine meanness of it, and publish its meanness to the world; or if it were sublime, to know it by experience, and be able to give a true account of it in my next excursion.” Henry David Thoreau …Walden
b u
p s

i’m aggravated

 I am thinking about how much better off we all are when we focus on our aptitudes and gifts – we project optimism and the world sees and experiences energy that can be employed in positive ways in contrast to feeling stressed and tired over trying to be who we are not – attitudes that cast shadows on the universe and serve no one.
Celebrate your differences – free yourself from thinking you must conform – instead, focus on what is positively different about you. Why would anyone want to put forth an effort to be something they are not divinely designed to be? And how are all of these stereotypical lifestyles perpetuating? Who’s making all of these rules – and why are we buying the propaganda? We speak of the “dumbing down” in terms of education, but how about the “dumbing down” of society and our willingness to buy all of this marketing? Heck, yahoo even tells me the 10 jobs that would make me happy!! What???  We are all individuals and the only “rule” we have is to become our best self. Steven Pressfield  says it best – “ Our job in this lifetime is not to shape ourselves into some ideal we imagine we ought to be, but to find out who we already are and become it.“  or as Pablo Picasso’s mother told him – “When I was a child, my mother said to me, ‘If you become a soldier, you’ll be a general. If you become a monk you’ll end up as the pope.’ Instead I became a painter and wound up as Picasso.” Thank God he did not grow up in this stereotyped, status quo, plastic society we have succumbed to.