Finally, the rains come. I have lost two small fig trees and plenty of periwinkles in this drought. I am inside now – cozy with the rain at the window and the tiny sounds the coffee maker is making. I love this day of healing. I have gotten to a point where rainy days are my friend. Days of long ago, when children were small and needed direction, were difficult in this rain. Old and forgotten toys were brought down from the attic, tent houses were made over the harvest table, cookies baked and spoons were licked as deep breaths were taken (by me). Funny, but in writing these words, I find joy in those magical days of childhood that time has tempered. Anyway, fast forward and here I am in the same old house with a rainy summer day stretched out ahead that belongs to ME! I hope to paint and clean up a room. Yes, a room, not the whole house – my goals are very relaxed these days that I approach 60 – really, who cares?
I think about things and people on these kind of days and feel it is Nature’s ticket to go back and reflect – to slow down to remember and sort. The trees and plants are heavy with moisture and green from the nitrogen; they are happy and so am I. I am rereading The Invisible Garden, my cousin, Glenda’s favorite book, and my head swells with images of Concord grapevines, Ayers Pears and poles of legumes…the biggest garden ever. I strive for this outdoor pantry and hope I can physically do it when I have more TIME. I do despise excuses and I just made one…the TIME is now.
Anyway, I am headed to one lucky room today – the room that gets a scrubbing and when I am finished, I will insist on feeling satisfaction – no more lofty goals for me except to plant that pantry…
Staying focused on a goal is what, I think, sets someone apart – it is what lifts you to a higher place. It seems easy enough to have goals, to speak of them, and to actually do many things towards accomplishing them. The difficult part is “sticking to it”. That’s where most of us fall short. Every now and then someone emerges that has stayed with their goal for the long run and have achieved it. “Stick to – edness.” It seems we become preoccupied with thoughts of what others think – thoughts driven by ego and ego distracts; it is the voice asking, who doesn’t like this or me, who’s doing more or has more – destructive and superficial thoughts – who cares? Anyway,”stick to – edness”, that’s what has to happen to achieve goals – perseverance, determination, willpower, and a belief in yourself and your purpose – leave ego at the door. I am not really sure why I just wrote what I did – it just sort of came out. I was reading The Artists’ Way right before bed last night and I suppose some of what it said crept into my subconscious and it manifested itself with these words. I believe that art, true art, is spiritual and because of this belief, I “listen” and I stick to it.
Graphic design student Jonathan Mak Long
“Having an exciting destination is like setting a needle in your compass. From then on, the compass knows only one point – its ideal. And it will faithfully guide you there through the darkest nights and fiercest storms.”
I am re posting something that I am thinking of almost exactly one year later – this was a February 20, 2010 post and I find myself, again, contemplating this thought. I evaluate this past year in regards to this concept and I feel I have modestly practiced this philosophy – but…I need to implement more – hence, the re post.
I spent some of the morning reading my new book. It is one of Og Mandino’s books, The Greatest Secret in the World. Interesting and inspirational. So far, this is my favorite collection of words: “Good habits are the key to all success. Bad habits are the unlocked door to failure.” This resonates with me because I believe life is cumulative, every little thing moves us in a certain direction. Just as every thought we think becomes part of our fabric, everything we do positions us on a course. I have told this to my kids – make good choices, each day, each moment will position you in a place to decide between and amongst certain things – choose the right one. I think it really is simple, we just tend to clutter it up to where the edges are smeared and the choices become complicated. Overthinking. Anyway, I will focus on developing good habits, small ones that will add up to something good. I think more about Og Mandino’s analogy of the little “ant that can devour a tiger” – one little bite at a time – moving in the right direction. I feel empowered; I feel I can do what I want to do with a positive attitude and persistence – “stick to itness”.
I am in need of some sunshine and warm weather. I need to be in my garden planting seeds and fussing at my chickens. Spring officially arrives on March 20, about 1 month from today. I took a walk around today and found plum blossoms, a new assortment of birds, a bluer sky, and a promise of spring stirring in the wind. I am setting goals today – lofty goals that I will achieve.