Monthly Archives: September 2016

two pairs of shoes

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“Fear filled days and a media haze …information was once king but it is now the new pawn pushed around to distract and disorientate.” Joe Callanan

“Can I handle the seasons of my life?” Fleetwood Mac – Landslide

 “I choose two pairs of shoes the exact same, one for the yard and one for town. That’s all I want”. Me

These are the thoughts lurking, floating around in my mind on this Sunday morning in “late September” (Rod Stewart). It’s somewhat of a mixed up medley, so, I wrote them all down and tried to find the sense in it all, the connection.

The first two are obviously about the unknown future and how it teeters on such a tiny ledge never revealing what’s about to happen. Joe Callanan is a friend of a friend of mine and I follow him on FB. He lives in Spain and has interesting points of view that I like to think about – he is straightforward and causes me to think past my boundaries as I enjoy the melodious flow of his transcendent words. I asked permission to use the above words of his because I believe them to be true. My dad used to tell us, “Don’t believe anything you hear and only half of what you see”. I always thought that was such a negative and cynical thought but now, at 62, I get it. The only adjustment I could make to his suggestion now, would be more emphasis about believing what we “see” – much more of life has become an illusion. Anyway, I am more and more turned off from the media and more and more convinced my dad was right. That leaves me in a bad spot when it comes to making choices, I seek the truth but I have about run out of places to look, hence my deep continued connection to Nature – she never deceives. We have more and more sources at our disposal and more and more ways to sway, not more and more ways to reveal the truth…we have taken the low road. It’s tough to find your true thoughts, propaganda hits us “Left “and “Right”.

“Make yourself sheep and the wolves will eat you”…another quote, this one from Ben Franklin. I hope we all make the decisions of our lives based on our own thoughts. That’s as close to political as I care to project…I just want to make up my own mind.

The Fleetwood quote whizzed out of the song on the radio the other day, a song I have heard again and again for decades but somehow, that time, those words were all I heard and that question needed an answer. When you are young, there are no seasons of your life – youth just goes on forever, it seems. Now, for me, there are seasons of my life. I see them and I answer Fleetwood’s question with “no”, I was not prepared. This lack of preparation was not a bad thing, however. How do you prepare for life?  I probably won’t be prepared for the next season either, but I do know now, while I may not be ready, I will be okay.

And the last thought about my shoes sort of wraps up the whole tangled riddle of mismatched thoughts by putting into words that I want as much simplicity as I can control, beginning with my shoes. I don’t want or need all of the superfluous commotion around me anymore. It’s a difficult battle, however, this battle for things to be simple. I am certainly not at a point to be without, I do like comforts and aesthetics but now, I like fewer “things”. Although, you would not believe that if you saw the accumulation of 31 years of life in this house that is our home, every wall is filled with paintings and every closet and attic is filled with yesterday. But, somewhere amongst it all, I find a metaphysical clearing that has not existed before this season of my life. It is a clearing that only I know of and it tells me that the accumulation has stopped, that I can just be and exist happily with so much less, hence, my two pairs of shoes, one for the yard and one for “town”.

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wake up

 

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morning glory

 

 

 

I wake up each morning with a quick slide show in my head of what will be, most times, these things I imagine never happen. I always intend to do more than I actually do. This morning, however, I did something I have wanted to do for a very long time – greet the day, formally. I was outside by 6:30 watching the world wake up. I noticed how quiet my hens were, still perched and full and the two new kittens were stretching and curious when I appeared from the back door, as though I disturbed them. The sky was filled with cumulus clouds and early morning birds searching, as they do every day, for food.  The first flowers of summer, except for the lantanas, have lost their intensity but the late bloomers are so bountiful and beautiful. (I included a few shots of them).

Soon, the Satsumas will turn yellow and then, by Halloween, orange. My bees have done a great job this year pollinating. It is quiet,  because it is Saturday morning, people are still in their houses, many still asleep and the cars are not zooming down the road rushing to jobs they possibly dread, this is where it’s happening, this is the place to be, outside on an early Saturday morning. I am enveloped by the beauty that is given to us each day, beauty we so frequently chop down to “develop”, beauty we extinguish for profit, beauty we miss in our haste. Oh my, such negativity…sorry, but it comes from reality, I cannot help but see it and I don’t understand it.

oranges

I am still cutting okra and I will continue as long as I motivate myself to do so – it will continue to produce until the first frost. I remind myself how wonderful it will be in a gumbo this winter so I cut and freeze. Okra is so easy to grow and so delicious to have. As I posted last time, there are only a few Kieffer Pears left on the trees and I am not ambitious enough to do anything with them except include them in breakfast smoothies…perhaps one more cobbler could be on the docket.

 

 

 

That’s it, just a few words attached to visuals to , maybe, prompt you to take a glimpse of the early morning and notice what mother earth has been doing as you “sleep”.

twins

twins

b u

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